Ask Kari: I discovered my college-age son smokes pot — how should I handle this?

Dear Kari,

My son is home from college and staying back at home for summer. I was in his room dropping off something and I saw that he has marijuana on his bedside table. I was shocked! I never would have thought my son smoked pot and I am very disappointed. He was not home when I discovered this and I have not mentioned it to him yet. I am against taking all drugs. How do I handle this?

Shocked Mother in the Highlands

Dear Shocked Mother in the Highlands,

I can understand your feeling shocked to learn that your son may be smoking marijuana. It can be hard to learn new things about our adult children that surprise us. I do suggest that you pick a good time to talk with your son wherein you can calmly ask him about the marijuana. Inquire directly if it is his and does he regularly smoke it. If he does actively smoke marijuana, I suggest that you voice your concerns to him about using a drug and ask him to consider your feelings opposing such a choice. I am hoping that by you taking the time to even talk with him about this subject, he will feel the impact you are hoping for and reconsider his choices. Unfortunately, due to him being an adult and marijuana being legal in Washington, you will have to leave it at that.


As published in the July 2016 issue of Connections.


About Kari:

Kari O’Neill, MSW, LICSW, is a licensed independent clinical social worker and a resident of Issaquah Highlands.

This column is for entertainment purposes only. If you are in crisis and in need of support please contact the Crisis Clinic at 866-427-4747.

Email your Ask Kari questions to [email protected] or use our online form. All email user personal information will remain confidential and not be public.