My brother has been guilting me into feeling bad that our parents have loaned me money periodically to help me stay afloat. I have told him that my personal matters do not involve him, but he states that they do because it involves our parents and family money. How do you suggest I get him to stay out of my private matters?
– Feeling Hassled and Angry
Dear Feeling Hassled and Angry,
I do feel that the agreements you have with you parents regarding financial support are matters between you and them. I recommend you discuss you brother’s statements with your parents and ask for their input. Potentially, it may be best to have a family meeting and establish boundaries regarding general family matters and private family matters. Chart a course for occasions when not every family member is included in decisions, especially those involving money. Your parents are self-determining, and if they choose to periodically loan you money to get by, that is between you and them.
Kari O’Neill, MSW, LICSW, is a licensed independent clinical social worker and a resident of Issaquah Highlands.
This column is for entertainment purposes only. If you are in crisis and in need of support please contact the Crisis Clinic at 866-427-4747.