Ask Kari: My neighbor wants to host a playdate for our kids, but her house is filthy – what should I do?
Dear Kari,
I really like my neighbor and our children get along well with each other, but her house is filthy. I usually try to host play dates at my house, but she keeps pressing me to come over to her home instead. I can’t take seeing the week old dishes in her sink and dirty diapers and trash on her floors. Help, I can’t keep putting off letting her host us at her home.--Worried Playdate Mom
Dear Worried Playdate Mom,
You are in a delicate social dynamic. You like you neighbor and her children, but unfortunately her level of cleanliness differs from your own. Unfortunately, I do not believe that telling her your true feelings will go over well. Instead, I think that you need to continue practicing your good manners and make excuses as to why going to her home is not preferable. Maybe you can suggest that you meet in the park or another location to expand your play date locations and see if she loses interest in hosting.
–Kari
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About Kari: Dr. O’Neill is a Doctor of Social Work, and a board-certified licensed independent clinical social worker. Dr. O’Neill completed her undergraduate and graduate education at the University of Washington and her doctorate at Tulane University, and currently serves as an affiliated medical staff member at Swedish Hospital Issaquah.