Ask Kari: Can I be friendly with my ex-sister in law without offending my brother?
Dear Kari,
My ex-sister in law is getting married again. I like her very much and we are still friendly, as we talk a few times a year. I am not attending her upcoming wedding, as is it a destination wedding in Mexico but I am wondering if I should send her a gift. What do you think? Do you think it be will offensive to my brother if I do, as their marriage ended because she had an affair? (It was with someone different from who she is marrying.)--Still Friendly
Dear Still Friendly,
You did not mention how close you are with your brother and whether he has moved on from his relationship with his ex-wife. I will assume that he has and you are more concerned about proper etiquette versus causing poor family dynamics. I think it is perfectly fine to send a gift to you ex- sister in law. At this point you truly are just friends and friends send friends good wishes and sometimes gifts when they have a joyous occasion in their lives.
–Kari
About Kari:
Kari O’Neill, MSW, LICSW, is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker and the owner and Clinical Director of Issaquah Highlands Counseling Group (IHCG), which is now Kari O’Neill Counseling.
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