Ask Kari: I’m happily married — should I meet up with an old high school crush for a drink?

Dear Kari,

I recently went to my twentieth reunion and met up with an old guy friend from high school who I always had a crush on. Both of us are now married to other people and have kids of our own, but we danced all night together at the reunion and at the end of the night we kissed. He later sent me a text asking to me meet him for a drink. I don’t know what to do; I am happily married but still very attracted to him. Should I meet him for a drink?

--Still Feeling It

Dear Still Feeling It,

You state that you are happily married, yet are considering meeting up with a man who you recently kissed at a reunion gathering. I understand you are confused; you are confusing me. You claim to love your husband and be happily married, but also might want to hook up with another man from your past. It is one thing to go to a reunion and relive some old memories; it is another to begin an affair. If your family matters to you, I suggest you let your old friend know that you wish him well but cannot meet him for a drink as doing so could begin a path of risk and turmoil that you do not want to take.


As published in the March 2013 issue of Connections.

About Kari:

Kari O’Neill, MSW, LICSW, is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker and the owner and Clinical Director of Issaquah Highlands Counseling Group (IHCG), which is now Kari O’Neill Counseling.

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